Teeny Tiny Wee Wee

Yep. Definitely pregnant.

I had my first appointment with the OB today. She greeted me with, "Back already?" Well, yes. That does seem to be the case. Based on my last period, I am 10 weeks and 6 days along. Because my cycle had been somewhat irregular before I got pregnant, my doctor thought we'd do an ultrasound to make sure I'm not "further along than we think." WHAT?!!?

Due to some computer error, I ended up having to come back an hour later to get the ultrasound, which was fine because Peter was able to come as well. Ellie was SUPER excited to see the baby on the TV. Matthew was SUPER excited to play with the blinds in the waiting area.

When the tech started, she said I was about 11 weeks and 4 days, which I guess is pretty darn close to what I thought initially anyway. It definitely made it more real - looking at the screen at the tadpole looking thing that was actually moving around quite a bit (great - another active kid). Now it isn't just tiredness and heartburn. There's really a baby living inside of me!!! Crazy. I feel more... maternal towards it now, though.

I joked, "I guess it's too early to see what it is, huh?" She agreed, so I asked whether the baby had genitalia yet anyway. She said they "descend" at 7 weeks, then started looking around. About 5 seconds later, she goes, "There's definitely something between the legs!" I respond, "Could it be... umbilical cord?" She says, very resolutely, "No." At this point, Peter gets really excited and yells out, "It's a boy!" To which Ellie replies, "No. I want a girl." I ask the tech, "What percentage can you give me on this?" She says, "Pretty much a hundred."

Okay, I don't think they're supposed to give a 100% guarantee on the gender, especially this early! What the heck - I'm only about 11 weeks! Most people don't find out until 20 weeks! I guess the thing is that at this early stage, something between the legs can't really be anything else. Then she proceeded to give me multiple angles of the "thing" to further confirm. I don't even get, like a piddly 5% chance she could be wrong? Grr...

So going back to the story, Ellie is growing increasingly more agitated as Peter explains she's having another baby brother. Some of her arguments include: "But I already HAVE a brother." "But I really want a sister." "I don't like any boy names." "NO. I want a baby sister." All I can say is, "I know, baby. Mommy wanted a baby girl, too." She looks at me devastatingly and starts a slow low wail, which quickly escalates to heaving sobs. It was heartbreaking! Then Matthew, who'd been doing nothing this entire time except playing with the blinds, starts sobbing in response to Ellie. I almost started sobbing myself because she looked so mournful! The tech is trying to console her by saying she can name the baby anything she wants, but that just upsets her further.

It's been about 9 hours since we found out now. She's peacefully sleeping in her bed, somehow totally resolved with the idea of two baby brothers. We explained she'd be the only princess in the family now, that God knew she was such a good big sister to baby brothers (her response was, "But I'm only nice to my OTHER baby brother."), that she and Mommy would have to stick together as the only girls... I guess it worked because now she refers to my stomach as "he" and talked to him all day. I have to say, I'm still a little disappointed. Hopefully it'll be a nice mellow boy. If I could combine different characteristics of my two kids for this third:

• Mellow like Ellie (We could take her anywhere. Still can.)
• Social and friendly to everyone like Matthew
• A fast nurser like Matthew (7 minutes max, and he was DONE.)
• Sleeping through the night at 7 weeks like Ellie
• Easily trainable (sleeping-wise, at least) like Matthew
• Good at sharing, nurturing and kind like Ellie
• Smiley like both

What I'm preparing myself is more like this:

• Colic-y like Matthew (He had to be held anytime he was awake for 4 months.)
• Snobby and particular about who he likes like Ellie
• A snacker and grazer like Ellie (She'd nurse for an hour if I let her.)
• Waking up every 3 hours for many many months like Matthew (4, to be precise)
• Unable to fall asleep on his own like Ellie (for 2 years)
• Unwilling to share, stubborn and yell-y like Matthew
• Grumpy

Not to be a pessimist, but I feel like if I prepare myself for the worst, I can only be pleasantly surprised. What my biggest fear is is that my two boys will be like Peter and Paul as kids, especially regarding the stories of poo smeared on their naked bodies. OK, so they were both cheerful and friendly and stuff, but man - I look at Matthew sometimes with food smeared on his head or every toy in our house strewn about the room and I KNOW that he is Peter's son.

Anyway, whatever he's like, my life is going to be NUTS. Wish me luck!