Sibling Rivalry

So as the birth of this third baby, still nameless, is quickly approaching, my fears are quickly increasing. Some of my apprehensions this time around are definitely new; will we end up with a minivan after all? How will we handle being outnumbered by the kids? Will Matthew smoosh the baby? Can we ever travel again? Will one of my children finally look like me?!

One of my biggest apprehensions is having two boys so close in age. Most people know that Peter and his brother Paul have been fiercely competitive all their lives. The competition lives on in adulthood, although on friendlier terms now (although the occassional fist fight over Boggle was not out of the question, even post-college). Part of the problem is that they are so close in age, I think they just developed pretty much at the same time. Also, they're both naturally competitive. Also, they're both boys.

I don't know how much I can blame on the gender, actually, because I know quite a few competitive little girlfriends of Ellie. But in general, Ellie is super mellow. She rarely feels threatened if Matthew gets more attention. Rather, she's the first to show off his new skills. When he does silly things, she laughs the most. When he discovers new developments, she cheers him on. As I've said in the past, she really is the best big sister ever. She will be competitive with some of her friends occasionally, but almost never with her brother.

HOWEVER, my crazy little guy is ridiculously competitive with Ellie. Anything she does, he has to do, too. If you ask him, he'll tell you he can skip, jump, do backwards somersaults off the couch, shuffle (a tap dance move), help cook, read, and play computer. I think he truly believes in his mind that he is capable of doing these things. If Ellie ever does anything that gets a cheer or laugh, he immediately responds with, "Mommy, watch," and attempts to do it himself. If Peter is romping around with Ellie, he has to be a part of it. If she's cuddling with me, he tries to pry her off me and take her spot.

Unfortunately for Ellie, Matthew actually IS able to do some things better. She is not the most coordinated little girl, maybe partly due to the fact that we didn't really teach her to throw or kick or anything. But at his age of 1 1/2 and her current age of 3 3/4, he's probably a little more coordinated than she. He catches balls better, has better gross motor skills, can aim when he throws/kicks, etc. Sad. She doesn't seem to mind, but I think his motor skills will overtake hers soon.

So with Matthew already in rival mode, how will my two boys respond to each other? I used to tell people I hoped that this boy would at least be mellow like Ellie, but based on his activity level in utero, it seems highly unlikely that will be the case. Will I be able to handle them? My family was not big into arguing or fighting. There was a lot of silent treatment going on rather than yelling, so I don't know what I would do if both of these two end up being hot tempered (as Matty already is).

Everyone says boys are different. Not too sure if I'm excited to see that come into fruition. I'm so the mom of a girl, you know? I like dressing up and playing makeup and stuff. Sigh. What am I going to do with two boys?!